I first started writing about Wendy within days of her passing on Facebook. This went on for a few weeks before I realized that it wasn’t the right place for my deepest feelings about the love of my life. It didn’t feel personal enough. Though everyone was so kind in their responses, to me it seemed to cheapen a relationship that I held so sacred. Like a carpenter selling his favorite hammer at a yard sale. Or cashing in a rare coin that your grandfather gave you as a kid. I need more of a connection. One to one. That’s what works in real life for me. You and me, no distractions. So I decided that a book was in order. So a book it is, and a book it will be. It will take some time, but it’s what I need, and it’s what Wendy deserves.
So I will not share much here either. I hope you will be patient for the book. However, I will give you a glimpse into this divine person that my in-laws were blessed to call their daughter, my children were lucky to call their mother, and that I didn’t deserve but was so chosen to call my wife. A marriage only 34 years young. Wendy and I thought we would grow old and gray together. A couple of active, old people riding bikes in the Florida sun and staying on the move together until the end of our days.
We dated for five years prior to marriage, which began when I was a senior and she was a sophomore. A short romance came before that when I was a sophomore and she was in the eighth grade. .
But the roots go back further, a couple years before, when she was a sparkle in my eye on the school bus. Such a beautiful little perfect doll. She sat so pretty and I had to steal a peek at her every chance I could without staring.
I will just refer to Wendy as I did in her first memorial service in Michigan, as God’s masterpiece. A woman every bit as flawed as you or I and aware she was in need of a savior, but so much like our savior, for all she ever did was think of others. God is love, and Wendy is love. A walking, living example of how to love. Not just in word, but in deed. Not just a time or two, but every day of her life. Caring and doing for others was in Wendy’s every thought, her every step, her every breath. Anyone that knows her, knows that I’m not exaggerating. Caring for people was in Wendy’s DNA. For nearly 30 years, she was a registered nurse, providing ultimate care for her patients. A moment in passing with Wendy was as knowing a true friend for a life time. Her smile and contagious laughter could brighten even the darkest of days. One of her work associates referred to her as ” breezy baby”. She was the gentle breeze that blew in my life for nearly forty years, and still does in her own way.
But Wendy’s kindness to her friends, patients and acquaintance was a mere glimpse of her love for her family. There was absolutely nothing that Wendy wouldn’t do for her loved ones. At the center of that, my children and I experienced her love to the utmost. Many people are different behind closed doors. Not as nice as they are in public. But the kindness that the world saw can be multiplied by 1000 in the love she expressed to my children and I, especially me. As her husband, I was blessed with a love that any man can only hope for. A loyal, true and complete love that I dare question exists anywhere else but in our God. I am sorry to all others that I am the only one that knew the extent of her love to that degree, but ever thankful that it was me that it belonged to. Wendy was my personal angel of mercy. She was more than all the kings horses and all the kings men. Wendy was my personal Jesus.
But beyond that, as a faithful man, I seek to grow in Christ daily until my death. But I do so in thought and in speech, but very seldom in action. Wendy, however, exemplified God’s love. Daily. Not just in word, but in deed. Not complicated. Simple. Not think and say, but do. Wendy did love. Wendy was love. And Wendy still is love. Love is what makes this world what it is. And in my opinion, love is the reason we’re all here in the first place.
In the Christian faith bible, Paul writes in Galatians 5:22 of the fruits of the Spirit. There are nine of them. The first three are love, joy and peace. To know Wendy, is to truly know love, joy and peace